Backstage Pass to Trauma Care | Stacy on Presence and Persistence

Description

How do we show up and care well for others when life gets messy—especially when trauma is part of the journey?

This honest conversation features Tim Smith, CareImpact’s lead trauma care trainer, as he sits down with Stacy, a quietly courageous mom and educational assistant in Winnipeg. Stacy opens up about her journey into understanding trauma, both through personal experience and her challenging work in Winnipeg’s inner city. She discusses the ongoing, non-linear process of learning trauma care, the importance of presence and patience, and how showing up for others—and ourselves—can be transformative. This exchange is a heartfelt reminder that becoming trauma-informed is not about mastering a checklist, but about embracing continual learning, community, and compassion on the long road toward healing and care.

CareImpact Podcast Group: https://www.facebook.com/share/g/19rkPGbD7C/

• Transcript

  Johan Heinrichs [00:00:02]:

  Welcome to a special edition of Journey with Care, part of our summer Speedo series. These are quick, honest conversations designed for long walks, slow mornings, or stolen moments of peace in the middle of a busy season. Today's episode takes a slight detour from our usual format. I'm handing the mic over to Tim. He's our lead trauma care trainer at Care Impact. But more than that, Tim brings deep compassion, lived experience, and a gift for creating space for real conversation. Tim sits down with someone he knows not just as a colleague, but as a fellow traveler on the road to learning how to care well in the midst of real life messiness. Her name is Stacy.

  Johan Heinrichs [00:00:39]:

  She's a mom, an educational assistant, and a quietly courageous presence here in the Winnipeg community. Without giving away too much, I'll just say this, Stacy's story is not about having all the answers, it's about showing up anyway. Let's listen in.

  Tim Smith [00:00:58]:

  Stacy, it's so great to have you on the podcast with us this morning. And I have the privilege of knowing you and a little bit about your life because we work in team together, but we do want our listeners to get to know you a tiny bit. So first, would you just tell us what gave you a spark of joy this weekend?

  Stacy [00:01:13]:

  This weekend? Oh, I had a very spontaneous organic invitation. My my family, they were just last minute invited over to some dear friends of ours, to their house. And we just brought some subway over, and we just hung out in their backyard. And our dogs played together, and the kids all hung out. And it was just really beautiful. It was the best way to end the weekend. So that definitely sparked joy for me this weekend.

  Tim Smith [00:01:35]:

  So good. And this time of year, we're in spring right now. Our listeners are probably already in summer when they're hearing this. But, would you give our listeners also just a a little snapshot of who you are, a little bit about yourself, where you live, things you love to do, and what your day to day life looks like.

  Stacy [00:01:52]:

  Sure. Yes. Well, I am wife and mom of two teenagers. I live in Winnipeg, Manitoba, Canada. I'm originally from Alberta, and my family moved out here when my son was just six weeks old. So I've now been here for fifteen years, and I love Winnipeg. It has definitely become home for me. I work as a, educational assistant in the inner city of Winnipeg, specifically with a student with disabilities.

  Stacy [00:02:18]:

  And so, yes, just the nature of the other students that I work with, it's a very high needs area of Winnipeg. And so it's it's a very rewarding place to be in. I I really enjoy it.

  Tim Smith [00:02:29]:

  Beautiful. Lots of challenge, lots of reward is, I guess, how it goes, isn't it?

  Stacy [00:02:33]:

  Yes. Absolutely.

  Tim Smith [00:02:34]:

  Beautiful. Can you share a little bit about your journey in understanding trauma? What first opened your eyes to to learning more?

  Stacy [00:02:40]:

  I think it was a a marriage of trying to piece together my own history and people that I've loved along the way that I've known about their stories and the trauma they've walked through and how it's impacted them. And of course, when you're in a relationship with people, friendships with people who have trauma, you're affected too. That's that's kinda just the reality. And it was also maybe the more pressing need was when I began working in the job that I am in the location that I am. I very quickly realized that a lot of the behavioral issues that were coming up, a lot of the challenges, I didn't really know much about trauma, but I just kinda had a gut feeling. You know, this sort of feels like it's more than just kids choosing to be bad. Right? And that's sometimes the lens that, it's easy to look through maybe, if you don't understand how complex trauma can be. And so as I as I started to realize the reality and and the fact that my job, I I work very one on one with these kids in particular.

  Stacy [00:03:48]:

  I realized I needed to learn more and and just become more educated just for myself personally, but also for my daily interactions with these kids that I work with. So several people in my life had just kind of casually mentioned Care Impact along the way. And I hadn't really thought too much about it in those moments. But then I was just searching one day, Googling, you know, just different training opportunities. And Care Impact came up and I remembered, you know, some conversations I'd had in the past. The light bulb went on, and I realized, oh, they offer this trauma care training. I think that actually sounds like exactly what I need. And so that's how I ended up discovering Care Impact's trauma care training.

  Stacy [00:04:32]:

  And, yeah, it was kind of word-of-mouth, but very indirectly, I guess.

  Tim Smith [00:04:38]:

  I love how you describe that. A marriage kind of of recognizing what you're carrying yourself and then also what so many people in your life are carrying, not just in your workplace, although certainly there, but also just in your friends and connections. And there's a lot of trauma, isn't there? And so you took some training, and then you came back around and took some more training. And now you're on the training team, and you've recently just gone through our master class. As you think about that learning journey that you've been on, through Care Impact, and beyond, has there been a moment where something you've learned or realized help you approach a situation or relationship differently?

  Stacy [00:05:14]:

  Yes. A %. There have been many opportunities to put what I've been learning into practice, whether as a parent. I have teenagers, and and it's a process of relearning what parenting looks like in this season. Learning to put active listening into practice, helping coregulate the kids that I'm with, whether at home or at school, has been, I think, one of the greatest tools actually is just learning how much my presence makes a difference for them and helps them to regulate their own emotions. I used to have a problem. I probably still do trying to fix things very quickly so that we could just stop those big emotions from happening because they made me very uncomfortable, and I had a hard time with my own big emotions. And so it was a struggle as a parent for sure.

  Stacy [00:06:09]:

  And learning that letting those emotions come out and actually just sitting and being present with that person while they feel those emotions, helping them articulate them and just not leaving their side, but just allowing them to go through the process of of, you know, just processing, and helping them get to the other side. That's been, I think, probably one of the biggest tools that I found so effective. Just being present, coregulation, you know, connecting before I correct them is huge. It's it's just been a very life changing, approach to being with other people in general, but certainly as a parent and certainly as a NEA.

  Tim Smith [00:06:53]:

  I love that, Stacy. Thank you. The power of presence and, as you said at the beginning, being present to yourself, and what's going on inside you so that you can be present and let those emotions come out. That's one of the hardest things for me too. I know. Well, if someone, Stacy, is like was like you were, some years ago, beginning to explore this idea of trauma and trauma care, what encouragement would you offer them? What are some words that you might be able to give?

  Stacy [00:07:20]:

  I would say that it's not a course you can take and check off a box and say that you now know about trauma. I would say that even though I've taken the trauma care master course twice now, I was actually surprised that it actually impacted me just as much the second time as it did the first time. And that I still had things that I needed to sort through and and there was still things happening in around me that required me to spend the time thinking about trauma and how it affected other people. And I don't know, Tim, it's just not something that you can learn in a textbook and say that you know it. You know, it it's something that you might actually have to review many, many times and and just keep it fresh in your head, you know. And that's what I really love about being part of Care Impact is that it keeps it fresh in my head. I hear what different team members and trainers say and we will talk about experiences, you know, that come from different places, whether people are in foster care, like dealing with the foster care system or from teaching backgrounds or parenting. And I guess trauma care is maybe just an ongoing conversation that needs to happen and an ongoing posture of continually learning.

  Stacy [00:08:43]:

  I feel like I'm gonna probably have to take the trauma care master class, like, maybe 10 times before it really sinks in. I might, you know, I might just have to keep showing up because I feel truly that every time I do show up, I'm given something new to learn and to put into practice. And it's just it takes a lot of time to, you know, to relearn how to approach difficult situations with myself and with others, and just being patient in that process. That's what I would say is just be patient and don't feel the pressure to have it be an expert at it right away. It's just gonna take a lot of time.

  Tim Smith [00:09:20]:

  Thank you for that encouragement, Stacy. Patience for the long game because this is a long game, and don't do it alone is what I hear from you.

  Stacy [00:09:28]:

  Mhmm.

  Tim Smith [00:09:28]:

  Get that equipping and be in that community that can continually equip you because we're all in the in the journey anyways, carrying hard things or carrying others who are carrying hard things. And Yeah. The better we can come alongside each other and the more cooking we can have, the better. Isn't it? Beautiful. Thank you, Stacy. It's just such a delight to have you, for this little moment on our podcast. And bless you. I know in this moment, you're heading back to work.

  Tim Smith [00:09:51]:

  And so, yeah, may you be equipped with the patience and grace and everything you need, and, have a wonderful rest of your day. Thank you for coming on the podcast.

  Stacy [00:10:00]:

  Wonderful. Thank you so much for having me. It truly is a pleasure to talk about this. I really do appreciate the opportunity. Thank you, Tim.

  Johan Heinrichs [00:10:07]:

  Thank you for joining us on Journey with Care. To get more information on weekly episodes, upcoming opportunities, or to connect with our community, visit journeywithcare.ca, or find Care Impact on Facebook and Instagram. Or just check the show notes for these links and all the links related to this episode. Share your thoughts, leave us a message, and be part of a network of individuals journeying in faith and purpose. Together, let's discover how we can make a meaningful impact.